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Author Archives: Lee
In a few weeks, inmytummy.com and lifeupdated.net will go away, but all my content is still alive and well on lifeupdatedblog.wordpress.com. So if I feel like updating again (which I might, I sort of miss it…sometimes), you can find me there.
I’ve written this post a million times in my head but never actually typed it out. Blogging used to be this huge part of my life. I genuinely enjoyed taking pictures and documenting my life, whether that was food and work outs or just random day-to-day stuff. But things change. The blogging community changed. I changed. I had a kid. I got old. And what used to be a fun outlet started to feel less and less fun and it got to the point where I was only half-heartedly blogging every couple of weeks just because I felt like I had to.
Maybe my heart will be in it again one day. But for now, it’s not. So I think I’ll stop. Maybe I’ll miss it and start writing again, but maybe I won’t. Life’s funny like that.
I’m having a hard time getting a handle on my feelings regarding Alexander’s ASD diagnosis. There have been a lot of people that say they don’t see it which makes me doubt it myself. That said, he does have some issues and the diagnosis will just afford him more therapy to overcome them so I keep telling myself that. The process of setting up therapy is also somewhat overwhelming and I spent a week sort of ignoring it but I think this week will be more productive.
Anyway, there’s no natural segue into running so here’s an awkward one: I ran the Charles Harris 10K on Saturday.
This race is close to my house and I’ve done it a couple times in the past. It’s fairly flat for Atlanta and there’s a nice downhill toward the end. So when a few of the people from my running group mentioned they were signing up, I did too.
That’s me in the local high school gym before the race started. Phone reception in the gym was spotty so I wasn’t able to get in contact with anyone from the running group. Somehow though, I ran into them at the start line.
I started out too fast and kind of pooped out toward the end.
Map My Run ALWAYS measures long. Or is it short? Whichever means that it thinks I’m going farther (and thusly faster) than I really am. It does that. Anyone else?
I ended up finishing in 1:01:48, which I was pretty happy with.
Onward and upward! But not really upward because I hate running hills.
I knew Alexander wasn’t developing typically. Typically, I recently learned that you’re supposed to say typically instead of normally. Autism crossed my mind as it has probably crossed every parent’s mind but I dismissed it because Alexander is warm and funny and can make eye contact. So when we went to visit a developmental pediatrician, I wasn’t thinking autism. I think it was back there somewhere but I thought he’d get a diagnosis of “global developmental delay” or possibly “sensory processing disorder.” The latter mostly because I had been talking to a coworker whose son has SPD.
We were at the doctor’s office for close to two hours – I can’t even remember half the things he said. He showed us the results of the questionnaires that we’d filled out previously and then the word autism came up. It was weird the way the doctor did it though. He said, “When a child scores poorly on the social areas of these things, you start to think about autism” and then he asked us what we knew about it. After we said things like withdrawn, doesn’t make eye contact, flaps hands in corner, he went into this long spiel about how it’s not always like that and it’s a spectrum and he kept talking until I interrupted and said, “Do you think Alexander is on the spectrum?” Yes. He did.
I’m obviously sad. But more than anything, I sort of feel a sense of relief. It’s partially because now he’ll get access to a lot more therapy but I think it’s also because all these little things that he did that were always nagging at the back of my mind, they were real. I wasn’t being overly anxious, as I sometimes can be. All these little things that Alexander does or doesn’t do, all these little quirks, some of which bugged me and I hoped he’d grow out of and some of which I didn’t even register, it all adds up a bit more now.
So yeah, that happened.